Bye, bye, Mr Bargain Hunt Guy, drove my pickup to the thrift store but the bargains weren’t nigh. And silver hair grannies were drinking cocoa and chai, the day the bargains died.
On a recent trip to our island thrift store, Granny’s Attic, I stood in awe of an audacious offering: bagged fibers for $3.00. And my dear crafter pals, before you chastise me and share the various and awesome projects one can undertake employing used fiber, hear me out. This zip-locked treasure was seemingly the byproduct of an islander’s last load of jammies and hiking socks; yep, it was dryer lint in a sandwich bag . And while I can’t identify dog hair accurately, I’d venture to say the launderer shared quarters with a Siberian Husky (or grizzly bear).
At first I thought, hmmm, maybe it’s a wee bag of special fiber, combings from the rare Andean vicuna, the underbelly shedding of free-range chinchillas or even vestiges of a high-end knitting or felting project. As I looked closer, sliding my glasses forward down my nose, I inspected the bag’s contents with greater scrutiny (if that’s possible). One light touch secured my further disbelief. It was even worse than I thought; they were selling man-made fiber in bag. Acrylic, there I said it.
Uh, price check on aisle five…
In all fairness, I suspect someone in the back sorting room was just having a good laugh planting the curious bag for would-be bargain hunters to find. No doubt peeking through the door at the puzzled guy poring over a bag of unnatural fibers. So Merry Christmas Granny’s Attic, you got me. And may I salute your hard working (and cheeky) crew, and the fact that as a nonprofit thrift store you issued $50,000 in grants to island charities. I believe I’m personally accountable for one quarter of that figure (bags of dryer lint notwithstanding).