Kitchen Confrontation: Boz and the Bobblehead Bulldog

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Boz vs. the bobblehead: showdown at the Tall Clover corral

Boz was a pretty good pooch this year. Sure there were some mishaps,  encounters with oriental rugs that needed shampooing anyway, coffee table climbing expeditions for unattended hors d’oeuvres, and foraging safaris to find fresh chew toys in the form of young corn stalks and baby pumpkins, but for the most part, the big guy was a poster child of obedience, or at least his (and my) interpretation of it.

So when his pal (and mine) Tamara, presented him with a gift of a bobble-headed bulldog, his look (and mine) was one of a pause, which is not surprising as she usually brings steak and bacon scraps. (I assume for the dogs.) If a befuddled Boz could speak he’d likely have said, “Hmm, You can’t eat it, you can’t play with it, and it doesn’t look a bit like me anyway.

Tamara proceeded to tease him with his detachable-headed doppelganger, until Boz began to bark (translation: get that ugly thing out of my face).

What Tom says, “Tamara, Please, don’t tease Boz, he’ll be barking at that thing all night.”

What Tamara hears, “Tamara, blah, blah, blah, Boz, blah blah blah blah.

“Look buddy, this nook ain’t big enough for the two of us

Later that night Boz, made his move, jumping off the bed, and heading downstairs to secure the kitchen from the unwanted and unattractive interloper. Target found, the barking ensued. When I reached the kitchen, he was looking up at the bobblehead, growling slowly, purposefully. Bobble bully had nothing to say in return, just an icy possessed stare, that even disturbed me.

One coerced treat later, Boz was distracted enough to return upstairs. (Who’s the smarter one here?) The growling has since subsided but his fascination with the windowsill tchotchke has not. Perched on his favorite chair, he’s ready for it to make one false move.

As for Gracie, she hightailed upstairs when she saw Auntie Tamara coming at her with a canine pumpkin costume.Lucky for Boz his bumblebee outfit didn’t fit. (He’s one big bumble.)

What Tom says, “That’s sweet of you Tamara, but Boz and Gracie don’t do costumes. I promised them.”

What Tamara hears: “Blah, blah, blah, Tamara, blah Boz and Gracie blah blah blah blah.

Gracie often relies on her natural camouflage and lack of movement to thwart detection.

(Oh and Tamara, just for the record, you’re still B&G’s favorite Auntie, despite their recent humiliation, and that’s not the steak scraps talking either. Um, and that marinade, nice touch, uh I mean that’s what they tell me.)

12 COMMENTS

  1. Tamara sounds like she has a bit of mischief in her soul! Well, despite the humiliation of bumblebee suit, Boz, I’m sure will behave in the coming year too. Good dog!

  2. Mischief me? You should have seen Boz with the Bulldog birthday card (last summer) that someone sent Tom. I just picked it up and showed it to Boz and he went crazy barking at it-so I’d have to say “he started it!”. It does show some intelligence that he recognizes another dog though a one dimensional card is a bit of a stretch. And a tiny plastic figure is another improbability… Admittedly I did get a chuckle at Boz’s expense and promise to be a better aunty in the future, though the bumblebee and pumkin suit will be seen on a future blog come Halloween 2012 you-betcha. I’m altering Boz’s suit today for his roundness is just a bit too ample.

  3. Well, I think Aunt Tamara meant well, but Boz is a bit insulted. Completely understandable. I see a demise of this bobblehead in the near future. 😉

    Happy New Year, Tom!
    Shirley

  4. Tom — Is a food website a minimum requirement to reply here? Some very tasty items posted by your correspondents. Lebanese chocolate buttons. Oh, my.

    My Christmas gravlax was well received. I used brown sugar, instead of white, with the kosher salt-sugar mix and that may have been an improvement. But no pictures on my personal food site because there is no personal web site of any sort, food or otherwise. Perhaps a project for the New Year.

    A friend in Munich passes on his motto for 2012: “A bisserl was…geht allerweil.” He says it’s an old proverb of Bavarian mountain climbers, meaning: “A little step forward is always possible.”

    My modern German translation thinks this phrase makes no sense so I assume this is Bavarian regional dialect. Whatever. It’s a good motto for our times and I intend to adopt it for the next 12 months.

    Gotta love this weather. Happy New Year from our farm to yours.

  5. Dear Tom : This has got to be one of the funniest and most entertaining posts I have read in a long time. The pics of Boz gazing at the bobble head bully are precious!

    I hope that your New Year is all that want it to be without the vexation of having your bobble head stare at your from your window sill. So glad I found you in the blog-o-verse. Best wishes to you and your family in 2012! HAPPY NEW YEAR~

    chow! Devaki @ weavethousandflavors

  6. Gene, no website link required, just your funny, clever, thoughtful comments, which from what it seems is second nature for you.

    If so inclined, please send me your gravlax recipe (if not a secret) and I’ll give it a try. I can start saving up for fresh wild salmon. 😉

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