MacGyver Mom Takes On Mutant Alien Deer

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Mom takes on the task of deer proofing…

MacGyver Mom to the rescue; the deer never stood a chance.

As you may recall from previous posts, my mother is a woman of many hats, a can-do lady of infinite skill, capability and charm. So while I sat around whining about my recent Attack of Mutant Deer from Outer Space, my Mom put on her thinking cap and took on the challenge of finding a way to keep deer out of my garden and orchard. I can see her now at the kitchen table hatching her clever plan and ingenious deer-thwarting device.

deer bells on fenceThe bells that ring terror into the hearts of mutant alien deer.

My mother did not disappoint.  As I removed a parcel from my mailbox, it jingled, I mean really jingled.  Walking back to the house I sounded like a Clydesdale at Christmas, enough so that I broke into song… “Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way… .” (And this is why my neighbors scratch their heads.)

To thwart the deer, you must first become the deer

The return address told me MacGyver Mom had sprung into action, but just what was this cloaked calliope. Perhaps Boz and Gracie would be sporting new jester capes or holiday harnesses. A shiny avalanche of chrome bells and a spool of waterproof line spilled out of the package along with a note about how to use this noisy assembly to deter deer. Because the deer were wedging there big fat herbivore heads through my gates, my Mom believed affixing bells to said gates would startle the deer and make them hightail it to easier pickings (or at least saunter in a different direction). I smiled and thought, this elegantly simple solution may just work. I strung the bell-studded lariats across each gate, testing placement for optimum decibel and startle factor.

Dazed by the ringing bells, this buck tries for a quick getaway in my truck. (Good thing I removed the keys earlier.)

So how’s it working? It’s been a couple of weeks with no buck or doe breakthroughs, so my Mom may have something here. And when not acting as a deer deterrent, the bells alert Boz and Gracie of my return from the orchard, a clear signal that they may resume begging on the porch. One thing’s for sure, every time I open or close the gate, a slew of angels get their wings.  (Glad to help.) Mom, from me and on behalf of Boz and Gracie and some once wingless angels, thank you very much! Now for those of you who scoff at the idea of bells deterring deer, may I remind you that these same bells are purported to keep hikers like me from being a Grizzly’s next meal, and a hearty meal at that. (My friend Joan asserts the bells really act as a dinner bell.)

23 COMMENTS

  1. ♪ ♫ ♪ Let’s hear it for your Mom here! The funny thing is a cow bell is how I call my six little goats when I’m in one corner of the pasture and they’re in the other. “Oh, baaabies!” I call loudly. Of course, I’m holding up the bright yellow grain bucket at the same time! They come running. Enjoyed your post as always!

  2. Ah, yet another thing to try for my local deer population. Herds, I say–herds! And every last one of them hell-bent on preventing my Clematis from growing more than 3 inches tall!

  3. Brilliant idea and great post as usual. You’re Mom is amazing! (I bet the mailperson had a blast sneaking that one into the mail box). Ha.

  4. Tom, I am screaming for help!! Here I am, in the Cascade mountain area and the apricots are saying “take me home” Love your recipe for the jam…how many jars would 3# make? Can I double the recipe or is it best to do single recipes. Thinking of you. Susan

  5. Hahahaha…I love it…such great logic…I never think of those sort of things…glad it’s working so far! And hey, maybe you could start a new fashion 😉

  6. Going to try this to thwart the Mutant Bunnies from Hell that are chewing my Justicia Rizzardi to nubs.
    Do you think it will also work on the mountain lion and coyote that have been stalking the corgi’s ?

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